Is it really possible to keep a marriage happy ever after?
A great marriage is always something you will have to work at. And it is not only you. Both of the partners need to be willing to work at it. You will need lots of tender loving care to keep your relationship fresh and exciting. The chances that your relationship will be able to survive are a lot higher if both of you are ready to give and receive.
8 Tips on how to make your marriage work:
1. Learn how to communicate effectively. It doesn't matter if you just got married or if it has been a long time since you two started out - this will build a strong relationship. Always listen carefully to your partner and try to be able to comprehend what they are telling you. While talking to each other, give full attention to the conversation. It will help you greatly to understand them, when you are looking each other in the eyes when having a conversation. It is not enough to just listen to them. Always reveal through your behavior that you have clearly understood everything said.
2. Do not make the mistake to assume that you know how your partner thinks about something. It doesn't mean if you like to do something, that they want to do it with you. Ask them! Don't automatically assume they volunteer to do something with you, that you would like. Ask them first! Never forget to be so thoughtful to see if they would like to do it.
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3. Compliment them when you see them doing something nice. When you see him/her doing something nice, tell them - I got you! Then proceed to thank them for doing such a wonderful thing and tell them how much you appreciate it. Showing thankfulness will give your relationship an amazing boost. When you make the effort of showing your partner that they make you happy with something, you will be finding that they will repeat doing nice things.
4. Is there something that you both enjoy doing? Then do it at least one time a week together. Go to the cinema, take a course together, go walking, swimming of whatever you like. Find any interests that you can share and do these things often.
5. Be the best friend of your partner. Cheer them on when they are working toward something they want. Hold their hand when they need it and give them a shoulder to cry on. Reveal your dreams to them, share your goals and try to work together. Let them know you are proud of them when they accomplish goals.
6. Never neglect your partner. Don't get so wrapped up in your own life that you completely forget the everyday niceties. Hug and kiss them daily. Never spend the weekend on the TV or with your friends only. By making it a habit to spend quality time together each weekend, you will grow closer and have a lot more in common to talk about.
7. It is very important that you "never go to bed angry", this might be hard sometimes, but it is vital. If you let your anger boil long enough it will be much harder to resolve the problem and you will be trying to avoid it with leaving the house or going to bed.
Learning to agree to disagree if you have to will help in keeping the peace. But this is only working if you are really honest with yourself and you are sure that its OK to agree to disagree, specifically when it is a smaller problem. This helps you in not wasting time by being angry about small things.
8. It is OK to admit you are wrong. If you are wrong, admit it. Being proud doesn't help you achieving your goals and it will not support you to a great marriage either.
There are always individual differences in a relationship, but it is definitely possible to live together in a harmonic way. Keep doing the above mentioned things and make sure you have worked out any problem before going to bed.
Love and cherish each other. Build a strong bond by being loving and honest with each other. This will help you to make your marriage work.
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By Elke Neher

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